I miss your touch
by Breakin' Dishes
Summary: What would Gabriella do if Troy Bolton left. She isn't the stable freaky math girl we all knew. What if her world was crumbling? ONESHOT First kind of Troyella


**I miss your touch**

**A/N okay I had a lot of free 'revision' time in Business Studies and Maths so I wrote this lil one-shot because my friend was really in a bad mood so I snapped at my other friend who is now not talking to me lol so inspired story really, okay on with it. **

**Dedications: Zahra, Laura, and Sammy. I hope one of you forgives me, i hope the other 2 feel better :D**

**Disclaimer: I really don't own it….no really I don't, I wrote the song though.**

A tear trickled down my cheek as I dragged the blade roughly across my skin, wincing slightly as yet another scar embedded itself in my body; an addition to the memory map of pain and hurting. I pinched the cut slowly, watching in vain as the dark liquid oozed its way across my skin, edging closer and closer to freedom. The water that had been brewing in my eyes finally spilled over falling to the floor, crashing around me. Reaching over to my diary, I lifted it up of my nightstand feeling the soft purple fur between my fingers. Brushing the curls from my face I began to write.

_Dear Diary,_

_I did it again. Another memory to add to my walls, as you might say. I just can't stop thinking about him, about his smile most of the cuts were because he left me. I'm hugging his East High Jacket right now it still smells of him; I'll close me eyes…I can almost feel his touch. The day he told me he was leaving, that bruised my heart forever. _

Flashback

"Hey you"

Turning round a huge smile escaped me as my brown eyes met his sparkling blue ones; I was just so lost in the beauty of those eyes and his smile. I leaned in my lips meeting his and a passion tore through my body like never before. He pulled back slowly holding my shoulders steady, his eyes full of sadness.

"I'm leaving"

I grinned, that was it?

"Yeah I know, but you'll be back in a month"

I leaned in to give him another kiss, but he just pushed me back. Eugh I just got rejected by my boyfriend.

"No I won't"

I looked up at him, a bit confused. What does he mean 'no I won't' he's only going to visit his granddad for the week. A tear formed in the corner of his eye and I saw how serious he was, he rested his arms around my waist pressing his lips against mine.

"I'm sorry Gabriella"

End Flashback

_Great I have big dirty tear stains all over the page now. It's been 4 months since he left me; I thought he loved me but it turns out I was wrong. I was just another girl for him to string along, I really don't see the point in living now diary, the only thing that ever made me happy left and I feel so alone. The scars are becoming deeper, the wounds are taking longer to heal; and this isn't just what's on my arm. I'm cutting my legs now, it's easier I gave up on skirts long ago and I can just pretend I cut myself while cooking. I bought my first short sleeved top in about 3 months it had filled me with some hope; but I know I'll always be empty inside, because Troy Bolton has left me. _

_Depressively yours _

_Gabriella Montez a.k.a human chopping board_

I closed the pages, not wanting to write more to re-live more. Every night I lay awake thinking of him, how he left, how I need him now more than ever. He was the only one that could save me. Picking the blade laid next to me, I take in all the memories. Bringing myself to do it one more time; to waste away. I hug Troy's jacket close, my one remaining memory, with a final sigh I drag the blade across my skin, sinking further into the night.

_I lay awake at night_

_Thinking of what you did to me_

_Why did you leave me so alone?_

_Breathless, Still_

_I need to see your face again_

_To know you're still ok_

_I can't bring myself to call you_

_I can't bring myself to talk_

_I'm all alone in this world now_

_Blades my only hope_

_I write a new song everyday now_

_I cut a new line everyday now_

_My body has changed since you left me_

_Full of flaws and imperfections _

_The scars that cut so deep now_

_Deeper than the wounds you dug in me_

_I miss your smile_

_I miss your laugh_

_I miss your eyes_

_I miss your cries_

_But most of all_

_Troy Bolton_

_I miss your touch_

**A/N okay please review guys that was my first sort of Troyella. Okay I have Exams and drama and then im going away then I have a dance thing, so I may not be able to review my other stories till like end of March but im trying so hard. Love all you guys xxxx Oh and yes it's short but i swear my teacher was watching like a HAWK!! Oh and anyone watching Celebrity Big Brother in England? My gosh Jade or Shilpa tonight! ooooo**


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